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Snarf Central
Nov. 2nd, 2004 11:54 pmOkay, because I got an A on my latest Japanese test, and because I just read a lovely story from one of my classmates, and because I think we all need a good laugh right about now, IT'S TIME FOR FUNNY-FIC RECS!!
These are my favorites of the humorous fics I have read in the Harry Potter fandom. The ones that made me chuckle constantly. The ones that made me snarf water up my nose. The ones that worried me because I had to laugh late at night when my father was sleeping in the next room and I was afraid I would wake him with my guffawing.
So.
(Disclaimers on the stories themselves, not here. Make sure you read them.)
And I recommend no spew-able food- or drink-type things, or your computer might bite it...
First off, let's go with an all-around goody.
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban in Fifteen Minutes by Cleolinda
Rated PG-13
Basically, what the title says. An absolutely hilarious parody of the latest HP movie. Everything's here: ships, people, fans, and SPOILERS GALORE. If you have not yet seen the movie, DO NOT READ THIS. It will be utterly spoiled, and you won't get half the jokes anyway.
...
And now, High Maintenance by Moni Sparklespiff, 6 chapters so far.
H/D, rated PG-13
Draco is poor. Draco needs things. Draco is willing to seduce the second-richest student in Hogwarts in order to accomplish this. There's only one problem - it's Harry Potter. Lordy, this fic is a kick! The caricatures of each of our well-loved characters are so funny! Watch for Ron's lack of inner monologue, and Crabbe and Goyle's brief but memorable appearance. And Blaise... good Lord, Blaise...
...
A couple from Chrystal (![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
dracorocksmysox)...
Groceries H/D, rated NC-17 (a re-post, but hell, I am still laughing...)
and Diabolical Donuts, Pernicious Pies, and Evil Banking H/D, rated R
Diabolical Donuts has Draco raising money... by holding a "Quick, buy me, I'm sexy" auction! Giggles abound with this fic... Basically everyone makes an appearance, in some way, shape, or form. Keep an eye out for Lucius and Narcissa. Quite a joy.
...
One of my favorites for absolute ludicrous-ness... (is that even a word?)
The Talk, or, Mortification by Youngblood
Rated PG-13
It seems that it is high time Harry got a dose of sex-ed. This fic had me in stitches. Not going to say much else, except that the ending imagery... is PRICELESS.
...
Draco Malfoy and the Supersonic Super Sexy Mind-Rays of Destiny bystellabelle
H/D, rated PG-13-ish
Draco's birthday sheds a whole new light on things... This is so cutting and sharp and witty... Draco is marvelous, Draco's friends are a laugh-and-a-half, and Harry is... put-upon. Poor baby.
...
And now... THE FUNNIEST FIC IN THE FANDOM.
Extracurricular by Ivy Blossom
A Parody ~~ Mock Two ~~ The Third Movement ~~ The Miriam Webster Edition (Unabridged)
H/D, rated R
The world is going to end. Luckily, Dumbledore has discovered a way for Harry and Draco to... ahem... save it. This is the fic that inspired me to write The Fourth Unforgivable. I ADORE this fic. Makes me laugh harder every time I read it. Just can't get enough... Sadly, it seems that Ivy Blossom has removed herself from the fandom... *sniffle* At least we have this and other wonderful examples of her work to read. She is so awesome!
**if these links do not work, it is probably because you need a PSA (Potter Slash Archive) password. I know they have age restrictions... You will have to check out the site itself**
...
As a delicious little non-HP finish:
All you LOTR fans out there, do yourself a huge favor and go read The Very Secret Diaries by Cassandra Claire
Rated R for innuendo
Absolutely snarf-worthy. A few spots that may make you uneasy... Oh Lordy, I read these to EVERYONE. Parents, cousins, sister, friends... MAKE SURE YOU READ THEM IN ORDER: FIRST COLUMN TOP TO BOTTOM, THEN ON TO THE NEXT COLUMN. Believe me, they are much funnier this way.
And then do yourself another huge favor and go read the book Bored of the Rings by Harvard Lampoon. Couldn't decide whether to be appalled or immensely tickled by this parody... I have decided it is a little of both. (It would help if you have read the original trilogy first, though...)
...
Alright! Hope you all got a good floor-roll, or a beverage-snarf, or an insane-wake-up-your-housemates-cackle, or some such whatever. Nighters, all! Sweets dreams. ^_^
These are my favorites of the humorous fics I have read in the Harry Potter fandom. The ones that made me chuckle constantly. The ones that made me snarf water up my nose. The ones that worried me because I had to laugh late at night when my father was sleeping in the next room and I was afraid I would wake him with my guffawing.
So.
(Disclaimers on the stories themselves, not here. Make sure you read them.)
And I recommend no spew-able food- or drink-type things, or your computer might bite it...
First off, let's go with an all-around goody.
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban in Fifteen Minutes by Cleolinda
Rated PG-13
Basically, what the title says. An absolutely hilarious parody of the latest HP movie. Everything's here: ships, people, fans, and SPOILERS GALORE. If you have not yet seen the movie, DO NOT READ THIS. It will be utterly spoiled, and you won't get half the jokes anyway.
...
And now, High Maintenance by Moni Sparklespiff, 6 chapters so far.
H/D, rated PG-13
Draco is poor. Draco needs things. Draco is willing to seduce the second-richest student in Hogwarts in order to accomplish this. There's only one problem - it's Harry Potter. Lordy, this fic is a kick! The caricatures of each of our well-loved characters are so funny! Watch for Ron's lack of inner monologue, and Crabbe and Goyle's brief but memorable appearance. And Blaise... good Lord, Blaise...
...
A couple from Chrystal (
dracorocksmysox)...Groceries H/D, rated NC-17 (a re-post, but hell, I am still laughing...)
and Diabolical Donuts, Pernicious Pies, and Evil Banking H/D, rated R
Diabolical Donuts has Draco raising money... by holding a "Quick, buy me, I'm sexy" auction! Giggles abound with this fic... Basically everyone makes an appearance, in some way, shape, or form. Keep an eye out for Lucius and Narcissa. Quite a joy.
...
One of my favorites for absolute ludicrous-ness... (is that even a word?)
The Talk, or, Mortification by Youngblood
Rated PG-13
It seems that it is high time Harry got a dose of sex-ed. This fic had me in stitches. Not going to say much else, except that the ending imagery... is PRICELESS.
...
Draco Malfoy and the Supersonic Super Sexy Mind-Rays of Destiny by
stellabelleH/D, rated PG-13-ish
Draco's birthday sheds a whole new light on things... This is so cutting and sharp and witty... Draco is marvelous, Draco's friends are a laugh-and-a-half, and Harry is... put-upon. Poor baby.
...
And now... THE FUNNIEST FIC IN THE FANDOM.
Extracurricular by Ivy Blossom
A Parody ~~ Mock Two ~~ The Third Movement ~~ The Miriam Webster Edition (Unabridged)
H/D, rated R
The world is going to end. Luckily, Dumbledore has discovered a way for Harry and Draco to... ahem... save it. This is the fic that inspired me to write The Fourth Unforgivable. I ADORE this fic. Makes me laugh harder every time I read it. Just can't get enough... Sadly, it seems that Ivy Blossom has removed herself from the fandom... *sniffle* At least we have this and other wonderful examples of her work to read. She is so awesome!
**if these links do not work, it is probably because you need a PSA (Potter Slash Archive) password. I know they have age restrictions... You will have to check out the site itself**
...
As a delicious little non-HP finish:
All you LOTR fans out there, do yourself a huge favor and go read The Very Secret Diaries by Cassandra Claire
Rated R for innuendo
Absolutely snarf-worthy. A few spots that may make you uneasy... Oh Lordy, I read these to EVERYONE. Parents, cousins, sister, friends... MAKE SURE YOU READ THEM IN ORDER: FIRST COLUMN TOP TO BOTTOM, THEN ON TO THE NEXT COLUMN. Believe me, they are much funnier this way.
And then do yourself another huge favor and go read the book Bored of the Rings by Harvard Lampoon. Couldn't decide whether to be appalled or immensely tickled by this parody... I have decided it is a little of both. (It would help if you have read the original trilogy first, though...)
...
Alright! Hope you all got a good floor-roll, or a beverage-snarf, or an insane-wake-up-your-housemates-cackle, or some such whatever. Nighters, all! Sweets dreams. ^_^
